Michele Bachmann essentially admitted that Libya’s Colonel Gadhafi would still be in power if she was president. Of course, if Michele Bachmann was president, Colonel Gadhafi would be the least of our problems. According to Bachmann, the US got “kicked out” of Iraq. Michele, I don’t know if you’ve been paying attention, but most of us here wanted to get the hell out of there. Bachmann said “we’re being kicked out by the very people that we liberated.” We liberated them! How dare they make their own decisions! Hey, once we liberate you, you have to do as we say. It seems Michele thinks that once you make a terrible mistake, you should just stick with it… kind of like her marriage to Marcus. Sorry, Michele. Iraq was a mistake, and we’re getting out of it. It’s your prerogative if you want to spend the rest of your life with a man who a man who secretly wants to spend the rest of his life with Ricky Martin.
Conservatives seem to think the country of Iraq is our personal property. I think they took the admonition that “If you break it, you own it” a little bit too literally. Maybe these Republican critics would be happier if President Obama made his announcement while wearing a codpiece.
Police forces all over America are facing allegations of abuse of power. But when the police are abusing power, they’re not abusing their own power. They’re abusing the power of the rich… for the rich. If the police ever realize that they don’t have any real power, maybe they’d join the 99 percent.
Rick Perry goes birther! When asked if he thought Obama was born in the US, Rick Perry said “Well, I don’t have a definitive answer, because he’s never seen my birth certificate.” What? The sad thing is, Perry would have looked better if the interview stopped right there. When asked again—somewhat more slowly—Rick said “I don’t know. I had dinner with Donald Trump the other night.” Wow. He makes that sound like an excuse for being confused, like “I don’t know, I’ve been drinking all morning.” Poor Rick Perry! It’s true—if you go into a dinner with Donald Trump stupid, you can only come out even dumber.